When to Consider Family Mediation 

Family is the closest and most committed relationship we have. It provides a tangible and emotional safety net, but also produces issues and memories that are emotionally laden and often have long-lasting implications. They may be associated with perceived injuries or injustices experienced in the past from one another, or relate to future issues such as inheritance.

We’re reluctant to broach them due to the high probability of disagreement, and possibly hostility. And once opened, the issue may create ill-will – and take unexpected turns – long after the family goes its separate ways.

Enter mediation. Mediation is a process of resolving conflict through structured, non-adversarial discussion, where a neutral mediator helps the parties agree on solutions which best fit everyone’s interests and needs.

In brief, mediation works something like this:

• Each party presents their perspective of the issue.
• We strive to understand the interests and needs that underlie the positions.
• We then analyze the resources available to meet those interests and needs.
• Together, we develop creative alternatives for satisfying all parties.
• Lastly, we jointly assess the relative merits of each alternative, until agreement is reached on the best solution for all sides.

Mediation has proven most successful in conflict between parties who have a clear interest in the ongoing relationship. This is the case in family disagreements over property, wills or inheritance, as well as over household or parenting issues. It is also the case in disputes within companies or between business associates.

The issues and process in Family Mediation typically involve matters of interpersonal communication and unexpressed emotions. Family therapists trained as mediators bring the sensitivity and experience with family dynamics that are essential in resolving deep, often multi-generational, family issues. Mediation with a family therapist enables issues to be addressed effectively on both emotional and substantive levels.

If the alternatives are to live with bitterness or resort to the legal system, Mediation is certainly a better solution. When family members fight, no one wins. In fact, it’s almost always possible to reach an agreement that meets, and is respectful of, the needs of both parties.

To summarize, Mediation is a sensible alternative where issues can be discussed and agreements reached that will enable your family to make important decisions while remaining united. Rather than living with ongoing conflict or resorting to the legal system for resolution, consult with a family mediator.